Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
my shit smells like andre
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
