just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
