You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
