She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Randomize
