You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
