friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
