You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
