I swear she didn't look like that last week.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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