i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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