chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
