Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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