No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
