I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I smell like Dick and happiness
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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