I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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