Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize
