But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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