the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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