I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
