some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
