You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
