i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
