Umm I'm too high to move.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
