P.S. I can't hear my feet
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize