piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize
