1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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