I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
oh god was she eating orange peels again
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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