No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Randomize
