That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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