Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
