my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
The air was thick with penises
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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