mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Randomize
