i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
