At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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