The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Bring me that man meat
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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