White coat. Heels.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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