i think my mom watched the whole time
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Randomize
