Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
