i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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