have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
The struggles of a small town man whore
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
