i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
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