ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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