Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
