it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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