it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
