Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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