I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize