people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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