How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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