New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
