SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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