for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
