"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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