I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
